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Alcohol and Drug Abuse: Receive Help Here.

One
of the most difficult decisions we ever make is to stay in a relationship,
which has gone downhill. Is it our fault? I can make it better. Can I
fix it? Is my spouse right? These are all examples of self-talk that can
occur as you’re thinking about your situation. Try not to make hasty decisions
until you are calmer and, thus, more logical. Avoid being hard on yourself,
as you did nothing on purpose.
For generations we have watched movies and listened to songs about fantasy.
Many are about very unrealistic relationships that are adolescent at best.
Yet, this is what we learn. This information about being together forever
or always being happy is injected into our brains. The brain does not
know if this is accurate information or not. It simply takes it in. We
use this measuring stick when we find a “significant other”
and begin to bond. Of course, we are on our best behavior for the first
year or two of the relationship and sometimes longer. Well, guess what?
So is the other person. Usually there are roses and movies and dinners
and polite conversations and impressive dreams. All this is fine, exciting
and wonderful!!!!!!!!!!!!! However, it doesn’t continue this way. When
the guard is let down and there is security(?) in the relationship, the
real person steps forward. Then you see the disagreements, the temper,
the possessiveness, the jealousy – in general, you see the “warts.”
When there is drinking or drug use this reveals itself because the person’s
guard is down and because, if you are seeing a serious problem, it has
progressed. One of the common responses I get in my office is, “He
didn’t drink much when I met him.” If you are the typical human being
on this planet, you probably didn’t obtain accurate information on alcohol
and/or drug abuse as you grew up. You probably learned inaccurate information.
We are mislead by statements such as; “He’s got a wooden leg and
can really hold his liquor.” Another is “He (or she) drives
home and isn’t affected. They do not have a problem.” Another is;
‘Well, pot is not really addicting. At least we don’t drink like fishes
like our parents or like Bill.” In all of these cases, signals of
chemical abuse or dependence are evident to someone trained in chemical
dependence.
Most of us have seen unruly drinkers or drug users or abusers or addicts
and haven’t even noticed them. So don’t blame yourself. Simply make a
decision to let a good therapist coach you.
When a “healthy” person dates a problem drinker or drug user
they know what to do instinctively. They know/sense that this problem
is serious and they decide early on in the relationship to challenge the
person. At this point a stable and secure person will set boundaries,
“If you drink like that again, I have to find us a counselor and
we will go.”
However, if you are a needy person for some reason and have unmet needs
for closeness, you may find it difficult to set boundaries because you
may be rejected or you may feel rejected if the person gets angry. Well,
guess what? You can only please yourself. Do this and you’re pleased.
This will raise your self-esteem. However, give it time. More than likely,
you have time. Try to obtain a good counselor who is state licensed in
this area (drug and alcohol abuse, relationships or marriages) and set
an appointment. If your spouse will not go, you go. You deserve an objective
viewpoint, support, encouragement, reality-based feedback, a more effective
belief system and an education on chemical dependence.
You’ve heard the saying; “You can’t love another until you love yourself.”
Well it’s true. You have to have your independence and enjoy life as an
individual, have interests of your own, enjoy others’ company and have
hobbies or job or career that are separate from your partner. Otherwise,
you are dependent on him or her for these things and will eventually feel
unfulfilled and resent the other person for not making you happy – an
impossible task. Again, don’t beat yourself up for not being a relationship
guru. I don’t know any. I think there may be some around but they don’t
talk or preach about it. Love is not being self-absorbed so you can’t
or won’t help. Love is waiting at the Mall when the spouse is shopping
without complaining too much or building resentment. Love is being willing
to circle back to the store and get the bread that you forgot and not
making a decision to lie and say you forgot. Love is being clear-headed
in the morning and being reasonably agreeable. Love is being less judgmental
and not blaming the spouse or family for petty things. Love is negotiating
and agreeing to “win-win” situations and working toward this
without selling out on personal beliefs and building a resentment. Love
is sticking in there when there is a crisis. Love is being able to yield
and not have to always be in control.
Remember that you are loveable mainly because you have love from self.
Don’t play God and hate yourself. Learn to be positive and love yourself
more and more and others will be attracted to you. This takes time so
be very gentle with you.

Dr.
Peter A. Butkins, LMT

P.S.
Here are some ways to change your belief system. These are affirmations
that may work for you. You can say them (or one of them) daily.
a. I now believe that I can take care of myself better and better and
let go of fear and anger today.
b. I will use the help available to me to heal.
c. I don’t have to do this alone.

Cosmetic Dentist Denton, TX | Cosmetic Dentist Services Denton, TX 76201

Cosmetic Dentist in Denton, TX

Years ago, aesthetic improvements in dentistry often meant multiple appointments and invasive procedures. But thanks to advances in cosmetic dentistry, dental professionals these days are able to help patients achieve spectacular results in a far less painful and time-consuming fashion. At Lillian Miller Dental, we’re pleased to offer our valued Denton, TX patients a variety of cosmetic solutions to suit their aesthetic needs.

Improving Your Smile

Whether you’re looking to fix a single crooked tooth or desire more extensive cosmetic work, the dedicated team at Lillian Miller Dental is at your service to provide cost-effective cosmetic dental treatments. When you visit our practice, you’ll benefit from our individualized, attentive approach to cosmetic dentistry. And because we want you to be comfortable with your course of treatment, we’ll take the time to address your concerns before we get started.

With convenient appointment scheduling and a friendly office staff, Lillian Miller Dental is the place to go in Denton, TX for cosmetic dentistry services. For more information or to schedule a consultation, call us today.

Denton, TX Dental Veneers | Lillian Miller Dental

What are Veneers?

One of the most popular and effective developments in cosmetic dentistry, veneers are thin, custom made casings that cover the front side of your teeth. Veneers are used to correct uneven teeth, worn enamel, discoloration, chipped teeth and irregular spacing, and can last over 20 years. In some cases, veneers can serve a restorative purpose and can protect a damaged tooth from further harm.

What Does the Procedure Involve?

After a thorough examination of your teeth, which may include X-rays and taking impressions of your teeth, your dentist will remove a thin layer of enamel from your teeth. Then he or she will create an impression and send it off to a laboratory to create the veneer. While the mold is being created, your dentist may provide you with temporary veneers. Finally, the veneer’s size and color are given one last adjustment before they are cemented to your tooth on your second visit.

What Are the Advantages of Veneers?

Veneers can give your teeth a more natural, aesthetically pleasing appearance and are stain resistant and soft on gums. In some cases, veneers can serve a restorative purpose and can protect a damaged tooth from further harm.

Types of Veneers

  • Porcelain
  • Resin Composite
  • Lumineers

Since porcelain veneers are more resistant to stains and chipping, they are generally more expensive. Lumineers are a particularly popular type of porcelain veneers that do not require your teeth to be shaved and can even be placed over crown or bridgework. A custom-made set of Lumineers can be installed in 2-3 visits and is proven to last over 20 years.

Will My Insurance Cover Veneers?

As this procedure is elective and primarily cosmetic, most dental insurers will not cover veneers. Talk to your dentist about the financing options available.

The information in the article is not intended to substitute for the counsel and expertise of a medical professional. We encourage you to discuss any decisions about treatment or care with your dentist.